I want my In-Laws to receive NOTHING

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I want my In-Laws to receive NOTHING

Postby archenemy » Mon Oct 09, 2017 12:56 pm

Hi Guys! I've missed being on here for a while, now. Cuz all of you are GREAT, here! I have a legitimate question to ask, it has to do with In-Laws. OK, so like Insurance policies & things you own, etc: (Question) My In-Laws treat me like absolute Garbage, call me "She", the whole 9 yards of crap. My Husband & I have no children. So my Husband would leave everything to me. And I would do the same. But I was thinking..if i died first, then everything is my Husband's. So, when he dies, he would have rewrote his will to leave everything to HIS rotten family. I want to make sure not 1 penny of money Ive earned, or ANY of my valuables get handed to his shitty family. Nothing, from Me! I hate them, & they hate me! So have any of you taken care of paperwork like what Im trying to explain, here? (LOL) I want something added in papers, that my 2 blood Sisters will receive my share of our estate. NOT HIS FAMILY. No way, in Hell..
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Re: I want my In-Laws to receive NOTHING

Postby Melody » Mon Oct 09, 2017 1:56 pm

I have an accounting degree, but obviously had to take some law. Unfortunately, I think your interpretation is correct. If you went first it would all go to him. Then if only ten minutes (or even 10 seconds) later it would go to his heirs - no matter how useless. I would contact either a lawyer or paralegal. Maybe you want to set up a trust or a 529 or even UFGTM (Uniform Gift to Minors) for a favorite niece or nephew.
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Re: I want my In-Laws to receive NOTHING

Postby Melody » Mon Oct 09, 2017 1:58 pm

You can name whomever and then a secondary in a life insurance policy. But if you named DH and he outlived him it would still go to HIS estate.
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Re: I want my In-Laws to receive NOTHING

Postby rubycrownedkinglet » Mon Oct 09, 2017 3:10 pm

We also dealt with this issue and drew up wills to reflect that the ESIBs would receive nothing. There is actually a clarification clause that mentions them by name. We don't have any children either and the idea that those reprobates would profit from our hard work was unthinkable.

We wrote it into our mirror wills that if one of us were to outlive the other just a short time, that our full estate would be distributed according to our wills, excluding the ESIBs by name. If you were to die first, your life insurance proceeds become part of his estate and even if you had a second beneficiary, the money would be his. How does your DH feel about where his money would go? Would he really want to leave it to his family and not yours? My DH told me he would turn over in his grave if the ESIBs, (his adoptive parent's children), got a penny. So it was easy for us to make our wills that way.

Without your DHs cooperation, the only thing you can do is will all your assets that aren't jointly owned to your sisters and cut him out of them completely. A trust could bypass him with your assets, but you'd have to name another person as trustee. Just remember that depending on the state in which you live, much more of what you own and what you've earned could be considered marital assets.

Another way to bypass him would be to title your life insurance policy with just your sisters as beneficiaries, or to make them the payable on death beneficiaries of any accounts you hold on your own, like a separate bank account, 401K or IRA.

Your DH would probably take that personally though.
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Re: I want my In-Laws to receive NOTHING

Postby archenemy » Tue Oct 10, 2017 3:53 pm

HI Melody and rubycrownedkinglet! I hope you're both doing well. Thank you for all of this information, you gave me. I want to make damn sure my in-laws never get a penny of anything, from me. Justice will still be mine; even in my very end! LOL. Seriously, tho, this is something i want to have all set up for; in case of my demise. Who knows what can happen in life, must be prepared. The pure hatred my in-laws dish out to me constantly..will be thrown right back in their faces! Victory! Haha
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Re: I want my In-Laws to receive NOTHING

Postby bsfighter1 » Wed Oct 11, 2017 2:19 pm

Hi archenemy. It sounds as though you might not trust your husband to respect your wishes if you died first?
"I've learned that with narcs, absence doesn't make the heart grow fonder, it makes the heart grow free."
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Re: I want my In-Laws to receive NOTHING

Postby archenemy » Thu Oct 12, 2017 10:26 am

bsfighter1 wrote:Hi archenemy. It sounds as though you might not trust your husband to respect your wishes if you died first?

HI bsfighter! How are you? My DH would absolutely respect my final wishes; Im not worried about that. What I AM worried about, is that I dont have all of this put on paper, legally. Cuz, who knows what Life might bring. I could die first. And I just want to make absolute sure, cuz I wholeheartedly despise his nasty Family. With no kids, I need to set this up, for my own peace of mind. I would truly turn over in my grave, if my DH's Family received anything from me. Lol! I must be prepared for anything concerning those Jackasses. I'm watching my own back; like they've taught me to do..
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Re: I want my In-Laws to receive NOTHING

Postby bsfighter1 » Thu Oct 12, 2017 5:45 pm

I agree to put things down on paper. Both DH and I are still 'youngish' but we both have wills made since years ago, actually after a yr of marriage I demanded we look again at our wills, since he had something like 50% of his assets going to his brothers if he died, which I thought was ludicrous particularly since I was pregnant. And that's when I thought they were decent people! I know nothing would have changed on that will had I not insisted he did something. Since then our wills have gone through many revisions since the ILs turned out to be so awful. It still irks me that something like 25% of our estate would go to these idiots if DH, me and god forbid our children died.

I worked him up to giving my sister, who is single and ill 75% if this happened, because she has been an unwavering support to all of us for years. In stark contrast, DH's brothers turned their back on him, often left him out, and condoned their nasty wives treatment of me although bils and I were 'friends' before they met their significant others.

Alas, DH and I have had so many issues (the ILs being one of many, but a major one) that I've left the 25% for now. Not worth the fight. I don't plan on dying anytime soon, but in the unlikely event they did inherit 25% hopefully there would be a way for me to haunt them so they'd be forced to give it to charity.
"I've learned that with narcs, absence doesn't make the heart grow fonder, it makes the heart grow free."
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