The Stepson and DIL as houseguests Story

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The Stepson and DIL as houseguests Story

Postby Melody » Sun Jul 30, 2017 9:54 am

Did this one hit a bit of a nerve with anyone else? I don't know why anyone would move furniture (unless there was a danger) but what is expected of parents with three young children? Pretty judgemental.

And while I don't have personal experience I know some kids do have accidents - their bladder isn't mature enough (its a genetic thing).

Did her husband want to see his son and his grandchildren? Probably. Are your own children just "houseguests"?

This woman couldn't be a parent herself, right? If this family goes c/o because of her attitude, I bet she's going to be the first to cry that she's a deserving grandmother and her graaaaandbabies are being "kept" from her.
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Re: The Stepson and DIL as houseguests Story

Postby IrishLass » Mon Jul 31, 2017 2:06 pm

I have to disagree a bit Melody. I mean it is one thing for temper tantrums, quite another when a 3 yr old is running around naked going to the toilet everywhere and the parents are literally not cleaning it up. The bio hazards alone in cleaning up human waste requires a hazmat suit for most professional cleaners. Those sink into the microfibers on the carpet and can cause all sorts of molds that could affect health issues. Does the writer sound worn out and angry, yes they do. However if her spouse is unwilling to speak up to the parents, the writer should. It sounds like the parents maybe too tired to give their kids boundaries or attention for potty training, discipline. If I stay at my own parents homes you bet my hubby and I pick up after ourselves and our kids. I would expect the parents to pickup after themselves and their children, however I would make that a CLEAR rule. That way everyone gets to enjoy time together and no one is in charge of doing all the cleaning and such by themselves. That is just my humble opinion though.
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Re: The Stepson and DIL as houseguests Story

Postby WatchingMyBack » Tue Aug 01, 2017 2:01 pm

I looked up this post.

She started off on a bad foot to me, with her "didn't even bring a hostess gift" crap. Really? Family has to bring a hostess gift?

She's bothered that her house has to be baby proofed? Oh, somebody call in the wahhhmbulance on that one. I mean, who in their right might mind expects to make some accommodation for their guests? (said with extreme sarcasm).

I'll throw her a bone and agree that a 3 year old that isn't toilet trained being allowed to run naked is bad parenting. All of my children were trained by the time they were 2, so it isn't something absolutely impossible to achieve. Some people are just lazy. Why wasn't this kid wearing pull-ups? Isn't that what they're made for?

I also don't allow food out of the main living areas in my house, so if they're taking food all over the house and into the bedrooms or bathrooms, I'd be miffed about that, too.

And bringing a dog and not toileting it themselves just speaks volumes that the stepson and DIL are lazy (most likely stepson is lazy and DIL is overwhelmed because her DH is no help.)

The stepmother sounds rigid and judgmental. Most of what she has said, I imagine was grossly exaggerated. If one of my kids had a cookie at MIL's house and made a crumb, she would tell people they spread food from one of the house to another. Anything they touched, she was instantly wiping it off with a sponge. Unwelcoming. Rigid.
“Make no judgments where you have no compassion.”
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Re: The Stepson and DIL as houseguests Story

Postby Hiddenjem » Fri Aug 18, 2017 5:56 am

I have experienced someone barely tolerating my off spring when "attempting" to visit for a few hours when they were younger! My experience with that person makes me think that the writer of the mentioned story doesn't really want the children around. We are and were "good" parents even then. However, this person would tell you that my boys has too much energy back then and we had the nerve to bring a ball and take them outside to play! The person (a Sil) told us that good children can sit quietly on the couch for hours and warch tv. Only bad children have energy and enjoy playing with a ball outside! We left and never went back nor invite them to our home.

Our "bad" children grew to enjoy soccer and even joined up with other "bad" children and were on soccer teams! :shock:

Her daughter battled obsesity and had to wear a helmet to fix her flat head from spending her baby years in a car seat in front of a television with a propped bottle. Yes, according to Sil, holding a child leads to "less cleaning" and cleaning is most important!

Yes, this is the Sil who is married to Dh's twin. The one who thinks our garage should be their own personal free home improvement store! :lol:

As a dog lover, I understand the realities of dog "family." I vote stay home and enjoy four legged "family time" and respect others homes who don't love or have dogs. It is part of being a responsible pet owner.

The persons issues with the parents and the children could of been addressed directly to the parents if they value the family and want to entertain in their home with them.
"I have learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel." Maya Angelou
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Re: The Stepson and DIL as houseguests Story

Postby Melody » Fri Aug 18, 2017 8:30 am

@Irishlass - of course if its really that bad you are of course right, however I'm getting the impression this was a little embellished and this is the type of person to run around after a newly walking baby with disinfectant in case they touch something.

@Watchingmyback - we're completely on the same page from no food upstairs (which my teenagers regularly defy), that DIL is pretty much on her own, and the neurotic follow the kids with a sponge (never "invited" back if they leave a fingerprint) etc.

@Hiddengem - ugh! Been there done that - what an uncomfortable situation! I get many compliment about all four of my children from professionals who actually know children. The criticism and tone in this post is why I thought no only does this woman not have children (and I know a lot of people who don't have kids but who are awesome with them), but she kind of hates them.
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Re: The Stepson and DIL as houseguests Story

Postby Hiddenjem » Fri Aug 18, 2017 9:42 am

I get the same impression as well Melody!
"I have learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel." Maya Angelou
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